Listening. Wondering. Is it God’s voice I hear or just a voice in my head? Questioning the steps I’m taking, pondering the direction I am headed. Am I where you would have me go?
Over the course of the past four days I have had encounters with several different people. People who in no way would have spoken to one another about me much less spoken about me and a particular verse.
On the first day I ran into a friend at the grocery store. As we were talking, a particular verse slipped from my lips as I was describing my life. I was a little caught off guard as I spoke the verse as a normal sentence. The second day as I was getting five kids ready for school, I was overwhelmed by a sense of the Holy Spirit and grabbed my notebook to write. Suddenly the same verse flowed from my mouth and so I wrote it down. Later that evening as I attended my weekly ladies bible study, as we watched part of the video series, the speaker spoke the verse. A smile formed on my face as chills ran down my spine. Not scary movies chills, but the kind you get when the Holy Spirit is showing you something. Then to end it all, last night as I sat around with a group of teenagers listening to a pastor speak, he gave those teenagers the exact verse to read. WHAT? Oh yeah! Ok God, I hear you. I know it’s you. I love these moments.
I am learning to listen. Learning to be aware of those times when God is trying to speak to me through the goodness in my life. He is always trying to teach me something new and I am more aware than ever when He does. This time the passage repeatedly spoken was:
Trust in the Lord and do good.
Then you will live safely in the land and prosper.
Take delight in the Lord,
and He will give you your heart’s desires.
Let me just say that in my younger years this passage meant something totally different than it does to me now. When I was young I believed if I followed the rules, God would give me all the “things” I ever wanted. Imagine my disappointment when I attempted to follow the rules, only to fail and never receive those “things” I thought I wanted.
Because of life and circumstances I have rediscovered these verses. They are not just things I have read about in a book. I have experienced the true meaning of this verse in my life and watched God fulfill His promise. He has given me my heart’s desires. What does that look like? Something like this: I used to think that “things” were what I needed to be happy. I was lonely and sad constantly looking for the next “thing” to make me happy. With each new “thing” I only became hungry for more “things” and in turn became more lonely and sadder. It took a huge storm to awaken my soul to find what it was my heart truly desired. There was a hole in my heart that needed to be filled. I had spent years following a religion, leaving me to miss out on something much bigger. Jesus.
I have learned that when I follow Jesus, love Jesus, find joy in Jesus, seek after Jesus, I am happy. Not only happy, but my heart begins to want the things He has for me, not what I want for myself. His desire, His plan, His best for my life become my greatest desires. It is in these things He has for me that I experience great joy.
I went through a heck of a mess over the course of several years. But during that mess I didn’t lose faith in my God. I trusted Him. I didn’t worry. Well sometimes I worried, but I knew in my heart, I could trust Him. I did my best to love and forgive while following Him and on the other side, He blessed me. My faith grew, my life changed and my heart began to desire the things He wanted for me.
I know there are those out there that doubt God. Doubt His existence. Doubt His promises. But there is no doubt in my mind that He is real. That all of His promises are true. I have lived it out. I have experienced the fullness of His presence in my life and the blessings that come from following Him. When we choose to trust Him, He gives us more than we could ever dream possible because He knows what is the absolute best for us and waits patiently for us to accept His invitation to trust, follow so that we might receive.
“My heart overflows with the abundance of Your love for me.
Joy fills my life as I walk daily in your will experiencing Your blessings in my life.
How can I love you more? How can I give more of myself to You? Show me Your ways. Let me walk in Your ways that I might experience the overflowing abundant joy of You in my life.”