Wednesday, October 2, 2013

Something to say...

When Jesus had finished telling these stories and illustrations, he left that part of the country.  He returned to Nazareth, his hometown.  When he taught there in the synagogue, everyone was amazed and said, “Where does he get his wisdom and the power to do miracles?”   Then they scoffed, “He’s just the carpenter’s son, and we know Mary, his mother, and his brothers-James, Joseph, Simon and Judas.  All his sisters live here among us. Where did he learn all these things?  And they were deeply offended and refused to believe in Him.

Then Jesus told them, “A prophet is honored everywhere except in his own hometown and among his own family.  And so he did only a few miracles there because of their unbelief.

Matthew 13:53-58

Several years ago, I was inspired to start a blog.  I remember the morning well.  I was driving home after dropping my fourth child off at preschool when the words of Matthew West’s song Something to Say played through the speakers of my car.  I also remember the goose bumps and the way the hair on the back of my neck stood up as I clearly heard the Holy Spirit speak to my heart, “You have something to say. Write about me to others.  ”  I remember grabbing hold of the steering wheel with both hands as I slowly peered through my rear view mirror to see who was in the back seat talking to me.  Imagine my surprise when the only “someone” I saw was my precious sleeping six month old. 

As I pulled into the driveway, I prayed.  Writing for others to read was not for someone like me.  It required transparency and vulnerability.  Neither with which I was comfortable.  I prayed some more.  For me, writing would be the easy part of this assignment because I could put my thoughts on paper.  The struggle would begin when it came time to hit the publish button.  Ugh. The agony and fear that coursed through my veins left me feeling nauseous.  I was so scared of coming across the wrong way and I did not want to offend anyone.  I hated the idea of opening myself up for “the world” to see.  Little did I know what was yet to come.

In the beginning, my readers were limited to the handful of people who knew about it.  Within the first few postings, I began to receive some negative anonymous comments.  I remember immediately wondering if I should quit writing.  I began to pray again.  Maybe what I heard in my car was the enemy.  Maybe he was setting me up.  My mind was all over the place.  I sat in tears as I searched for an answer.  Had I heard the Holy Spirit clearly that day?  What was the purpose of writing if I was only going to be attacked?  Then one morning I had a conversation with a friend who lived down the street.  She reminded me of the passage in Matthew.  I remember her saying that friends and family rejected even Jesus. She told me that I should not let the words of others keep me from being obedient to the Holy Spirit.  Her words were powerful that day and stayed with me.  Her words also reminded me that I had to “be like” Jesus.  I could not give up just because someone did not like what I had to say.  I also had to love even those who would say hurtful things.  The rejection was good and because of it, I grew those first couple of years.   My writing began to change and I became more transparent as I opened up and shared my life with those who took the time to read.    

I do not write a trendy blog about politics, food or fashion and so my audience is a little limited. I do not get tons of public comments and my blog is not shared by the masses.  However, what I do get are personal messages.  Messages from people who are hurting or need prayer.  People who are searching for answers. People who are questioning why bad things are happening in their life.  I get personal messages of encouragement or those wanting to share their own story.  It is amazing.  It is humbling.  It is God.

What I have learned through writing is that we all have a story to tell.  We all have been given something to share with others.  Five years ago, God began preparing me.  He has given me this amazing platform to share what I have learned though my struggles of divorce with those who need to hear.  I have watched as my story has traveled the globe and been read in places that I know I will probably never go. Those who need to hear of God’s amazing love and grace are finding hope. That is what God can do.  He takes our biggest messes and turns them into a beautiful message that we can share with those who are hurting and need to know Him.   It is incredible what God can accomplish through us when we say yes.  Everyone can make a difference.  Everyone has the ability to help change the world.  Everyone can live on mission!! Everyone has a story to tell! It just takes one simple yes when He asks us to follow.